GIven the PR mess created by Guido Barilla, the CEO of Barilla Pasta with the broadcasting of his bigoted opinions about Lesbian and Gay couples it would be understandable if you thought he was a prude. You might be right. But remember, this is Italy, and looking back at the history of advertising for Barilla Pasta you'll be surprised to discover they made a TV commercial directed by Federico Fellini — centered around a joke about oral sex. Heterosexual oral sex, but still....
Obviously, since Fellini died in 1993, it must have been Guido Barilla's father (or grandfather) who had a more casual attitude about sexuality. But I think it would be good for Guido Barilla to learn from his elders and be more playful and relaxed.
Made in 1984, the spot is hardly an example of Fellini's best work as either a filmmaker or writer/director of TV commercials (yes, he wrote the spot as well as directed it). The spot opens on a couple in a very expensive restaurant. They are being sexually flirtatious with each other as the head waiter explains the menu to them. The woman requests rigatoni, which is used in Itlalian slang to refer to oral sex. And the response from the wait staff is that it will certainly stay al dente, or, uh, hard.
My suggestion to Mr. Barilla is that he remake this commercial — with a gay male couple. And then find the right pasta metaphor for a lesbian couple and make that too.
The track record of the Obama administration isn't very good about this. In fact, they suck. Which is why I've signed on for Don't Ask Don't Give. Now here's the latest chance Obama has to make it right, or fuck up.
According the the L.A. Times:
A federal judge today ordered compensation
for a Los Angeles couple denied spousal benefits by the federal
government because they are gay men.
U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals Judge Stephen Reinhardt deemed the
denial of healthcare and other benefits to the spouse of federal public
defender Brad Levenson to be a violation of the Constitution's
guarantee of due process and discrimination on the basis of sexual
orientation, which is prohibited by California state law.
Levenson married his longtime partner, Tony Sears, on July 12, 2008,
during the five-month period when same-sex marriage was legal in
California. A ballot measure, Proposition 8, was passed a year ago
defining marriage as between one man and one woman.
Reinhardt, who is the federal judge responsible for resolving
employee disputes in the Federal Public Defenders office within the 9th
Circuit, had earlier ordered the Administrative Office of the U.S.
Courts to process Levenson's application for spousal benefits for
Sears. The federal government's Office of Personnel Management stepped
in to derail the enrollment, however, citing the 1996 Defense of
Marriage Act that prohibits the recognition of same-sex marriage for
the purpose of federal benefits or programs.
Levenson appealed, seeking either an independently contracted
benefits package for his spouse or payment of the equivalent value of
the coverage denied. Reinhardt ordered the latter, based on a "back
pay" provision in the law covering federal defense lawyers' employment.
"Considering that the federal government won't give Tony the equal
benefits package of other spouses, we are very pleased with this
decision," said Levenson. "Is it equal treatment? No. Is it a good
remedy? Yes. And we are appreciative of the judge's order."
Levenson said he and Sears have been keeping track of the costs of
insuring Sears independently and estimate the back pay and future
compensation will amount to thousands of dollars each year.
The judge's order is expected to resolve the injustice Reinhardt has
cited in previous orders in Levenson's case. But it also recognizes the
status quo of federal government rejection of gay marriage under the
Defense of Marriage Act. Several other challenges by those denied
federal benefits, like filing joint tax returns, are making their way
slowly through the federal courts.
The Obama administration has spoken out against what it sees as a
discriminatory policy toward gay spouses of federal employees but Atty.
Gen. Eric Holder has also said his office is obliged to defend the
practice as long as the Defense of Marriage Act remains law.
There it is. What will Obama and Holder do now? Fight the compensation? Let's see...
When I came out in 1970, I started hanging out on Christopher Street, since I wasn’t really a drinker and didn’t like the bar scene. Most gay men cruising on Christopher Street at the time were guys who lived in the Village and they had a prop that helped them avoid being arrested for loitering or cruising. How did it work? Well, dogs being what they are, when they see each other, they want to nose each other out. And this would allow two men to stand on the street and talk to each other (please resist thinking that men are dogs!) and it would look perfectly natural. Because in fact it is perfectly natural, dog or no dog. Except when I would hang out on the street, dogless and not living in the village, the police in their cruisers would sometimes drive right up onto the sidewalk to intimidate me and my friends. I was never arrested.
However, amazingly, people are still being arrested by the police for cruising. Last Tuesday, Slate magazine reported that despite the fact that the NY Supreme Court ruled the “anti-cruising” laws unconstitutional in 1983, the police still target and arrest men for simply stopping to have a private conversation with another man (even if one of those men is a police officer loitering with the sole goal of entrapment). In fact, the article notes that since 1983 there have been between bail, fines and court fees, New York City has taken in over $300,000 from more than 15,000 cases.
Not many men have contested the charges, and no one has fought back far enough to make it a rights violation case where the city has to pay damages. Because you can be sure, once the city has to cough up $300,000 or more because they violated our rights the orders will come down to make this unconstitutional practice a relic of the 70s.
Meanwhile, let’s stop for a minute to remember the false arrests a few months back that were supposedly for soliciting at porn shops that garnered protest in the community and much ire vented at Speaker Christine Quinn (who after much noise did something about it). Clearly there is a pattern of harassment against individual gay men by the police. Now add into the mix the recent bias-attack in Hell’s Kitchen where the police did not arrest an attacker. This became a media issue because one of the men attacked is a radio host, WPLJ DJ Blake Hayes. We don’t know how many gay men get shut down by the NYPD and don’t press it because they don’t have a channel to make the right noise (and consider too how many of us are ashamed that we have been attacked and are just grateful we’re not in the hospital.)
Let’s review. The NYPD has been: 1. Arresting gay men for cruising 2. Arresting gay men on trumped up charges of soliciting 3. Dismissing bias attacks against gay men.
Pardon me, but while I am in favor of marriage equality, I’d like to know that my basic rights (and my physical safety) are being protected. And I think some gay rights groups in the city might need to focus some righteous anger in the direction of the NYPD. It's sounds like it's time for an old-style GAA Zap, bringing media attention to this whole sordid affair. And to call for some heads.
New York State voters support 51 – 41 percent, with 8 percent undecided, a law allowing same-sex couples to marry, according to a Quinnipiac University poll released today.
This is the first poll by the independent Quinnipiac University showing support for same-sex marriage in New York State, where voters split 46 – 46 percent on this issue in a May 14 survey and opposed same-sex marriage 55 – 37 percent in an April 15, 2004, poll.
In this latest survey, women support same-sex marriage 58 – 35 percent, while men oppose it by a narrow 48 – 44 percent margin. Same-sex marriage wins 65 – 28 percent from Democrats and 52 – 42 percent from independent voters, while Republicans oppose it 66 – 27 percent. The proposal wins 52 – 42 percent support from white voters and 55 – 39 percent from Hispanics. Black voters split with 43 percent in favor and 42 percent opposed.
Voters who attend religious services at least once a week are opposed 63 – 31 percent, while those who attend less frequently support same-sex marriages 61 – 31 percent. Support also rises with income and education level.
New York State voters support same-sex civil unions 68 – 25 percent, with support from all groups, including 55 – 37 percent among Republicans. Overall support was 65 – 27 percent May 14.
“It’s the slimmest of majorities, but for the first time in a Quinnipiac University poll of New York State, same-sex marriage is ahead,” said Maurice Carroll, director of the Quinnipiac University Polling Institute. “Supporters have worked hard in the last six weeks, moving the needle from dead even to slightly ahead. Who knows how far they can move that needle in the next six weeks if the State Legislature doesn’t act.”
“It is interesting to note that support for same-sex civil unions, which gay marriage advocates say is an unacceptable alternative, has barely moved,” Carroll added. Given three choices: • 46 percent of New York State voters say same-sex couples should be allowed to marry; • 27 percent say they should be allowed to form civil unions; • 20 percent say there should be no legal recognition.
It’s Pride Month, and for Jews around the country — and around the world, it’s the time of year that has become traditional over the last couple of decades to celebrate a Pride Seder or a special Pride Shabbat.
This weekend in New York City there are a number of Queer Jewish Pride events. At Congregation Rodeph Shalom on the Upper West Side there is a dinner following Friday night services with Judy Gold as the Guest of Honor, you can register on the JCC site, or at this date best to call 646-505-5708.
At the Village Temple, the Pride Shabbat d’var will be given by Gabriel Blau on this weeks Torah reading, and titled "Building Open Tents, The Jewish Journey and Civil Rights." I’d like to be at both of these events, but this weekend I’ll be at NewFest, where I’ve marked out about 22 films I want to see — which means I will probably see about 15.
Meanwhile, the Temple for Universal Judaism is screening the film Hineini, a documentary about a young woman coming out in a Jewish high school, following services.
New Jersey won’t be left out — after all, they’re ahead of New York state in partnership rights for same-gender couples. And at B’nai Keshet, a Reconstructionist congregation, there will be a Pride Seder tied to the cause of marriage equality (which was the focus of the last seder at Congregation B’nai Jeshurun). And speaking of marriage equality, there is a great posting on the Jewish case for marriage equality from Australia (where pride seders have been celebrated as well).
Next weekend, down in Miami, at Temple Israel of Greater Miami, there will be a Pride Seder. I am always thrilled when I read about Pride Seders, since we started doing them at Congregation B’nai Jeshurun in 1995, based on the liturgy developed by the Queer Minyan in Berkeley. We expanded the text and added a number of rituals, calling it the Stonewall Seder. And over the years, as the text was picked up at other synagogues with additions and edits, we revised our text to reflect what we liked that we saw elsewhere. I wish there were one place where all the texts were collected so that someone could study the evolution of this new tradition.
And speaking of video clips, also at the JCC in NYC later this month is the Feigele Film Festival, with some great movies about queer life in Israel, including Veahavta—And Thou Shalt Love,Winner of the coveted Wolgin Prize for Best Drama at the Jerusalem Film Festival, 2008 and also inlcuding a documentary about pride celebrations in Jerusalem and how finally all religions of the middle east finally united — around a message of intolerance.
However you celebrate Pride Month — as Jew, Buddhist, Christian, Muslim, Atheist, Jain…may it reflect the deep love that our expression of love in the world stands for.
Another reason for quick passage of the Reuniting American Families Act. San Angelo's mayor J.W. Lown resigned from office to stay in Mexico while his partner waits to receive U.S. citizenship.
He had just won re-election with 89% of the vote, after already serving several terms. Mayor Pro Tem Jon Mark Hogg said “it
goes without saying we lost a great public servant with. He cared
about and advocated for the city of San Angelo.”
This is TEXAS people!!!! The world is getting more interesting as more people not only come out, but take public stances on how their lack of legal status affects not only their lives, but the life of the wider community. This is where marriage equality on a federal level would make a complete difference.
As public servants like former Mayor Lown, and servicemenbers like Lt. Choi and Lt. Co. Ferhrehbach continue to come out, it's going to be harder for the right to make the case against us. Who is next?
"The state's Roman Catholic bishops have been somewhat distracted, too, having focused their lobbying energies this session on defeating a bill that would extend the statute of limitations for victims of sexual abuse to bring civil claims, and have appeared unprepared for the battle over marriage."
Three videos, for a total of about 22 minutes, of smart talk that takes the discussion beyond simple same-sex marriage to wider social benefits for others as well, from the award-winning playwright and performer, Lisa Kron. At the Stonewall Seder in 2007, a ritual dinner celebrating what it means to be queer and Jewish.
Newsday reports that out gay businessman and legislator, Jon Cooper, has launched an website to explore a primary challenge in the 2010 Senate Race. The site shows Cooper with his partner Robert, and their five adopted children.
Check out his site and learn all about him. I like the idea of someone with serious gay family cred in the Senate.
