Okay, but I still prefer my old copy of Les poulets n'ont pas de chaises -- Chickens don't have chairs, a great book of completely surreal French comics published by, who else, Grove Press, in 1969.
Meanwhile "buck buck b-buck, we should take our bucks elsewhere and boycott Utah and LDS owned business." There a list to a link in a post below.
Back in the 70s, when the post-Stonewall gay movement was young and feeling the rush of a number of successes, the air started to go out of the energy. GLF ceased to exist. GAA meeting attendance had fallen precipitously. And then the orange juice queen squeezed our newly claimed rights out of Dade County. And the movement had a public figure who energized us and organized us.
Thank you Mormons. You've done it again.
The lgbt movement had become complacent. We are served by organizations that for the most part have a moribund leadership. So many queer folk think that because corporations are willing to advertise to us that we have our rights. Uh, no.
More important than marriage rights, we can still be fired all over the country, with no recourse, because we don’t have employment rights, housing rights or any of the anti-discrimination laws other groups are protected by. While I have fought for marriage equality here in NYC, in much of the country, marriage is not the first issue on the table. Discrimination laws. Hate crime laws. These come first. However, the Mormons have woken up the anger of the vast population of queer folk in places where relative equality has led to complacency. And this means marriage is the order of the day.
Certainly, I understand very deeply the reasons for marriage equality. The man I wanted to marry was a foreign national, and to stay in this country he had to deal with lawyers, visas, work regulations…a maze of madness that was nothing compared to post 9/11 insanity. There are many who live overseas with their partners simply because they do not enjoy the rights of any bi-national heterosexual couple. These folks are heartened by the new awakening of queer rage. And these Love Exiles are organized.
So let’s talk about queer rage and our enemies. Alison Stateman writes in Time Magazine about the dangers of being on a gay enemies list. Give me a break. Nixon had an enemies list. Me? I just want to know who considers my rights expendable, so I can be certain not to spend my money with their businesses. Yes, they have their right of free speech — which the court has decided includes monetary contributions to political campaigns. And I have my right to know who is saying what — and respond accordingly.
Which means I want to know what businesses are Mormon owned. I don’t want to stay at a Marriot thank you very much. I also want to know how many TV and radio stations are owned directly by the LDS church. I want to know which supermarket chain is Mormon owned.
That’s my right. I’m a man who likes to do business with people I like. Which means I don’t want to shop at companies I know contributed to opposing my rights. That said, if I were an employer, I would not discriminate against a Mormon in a job interview. Hell, I once hired an evangelical Christian who took his vacation to do missionary work and who volunteered with Campus Crusade for Christ. He was a good writer, and that was all I cared about. It’s not like I wasn’t out at the office. Everyone, everywhere I have ever worked, has known I’m gay. And the relationship with this employee was interesting to say the least — after all, I’m a member of several faith communities, and I was happy to talk to him about the Gospel of Thomas, among other things. This is where minds change and relationships evolve, one person at a time.
Which brings me to another development today: the Bangor Daily News reported “that more than 120 religious leaders from 14 different faith traditions across Maine have formed the Religious Coalition for the Freedom to Marry in Maine.”
That’s big news. And it’s news that doesn’t get out so well. Here in New York, Empire State Pride Agenda’s Pride in the Pulpit has hundreds of congregations and leaders of faith representing a whole host of denominations and faith traditions, including Methodist ministers in Syracuse, Reform rabbis in Westchester, Roman Catholics in Utica, Buddhist priests in New York City, and proud people of faith throughout New York State.” Yes, you read that right, Roman Catholics.
So I want my community to remember that people of faith are not the enemy. Organized religion isn’t even the enemy. Organized bigotry is the enemy. And bigots can use the already existing infrastructure of organized religion to pursue their agenda.
The Mormons though, are indeed a special case. This is a religion that had to have a prophetic revelation that only came under the duress of legal action, so that black people would be treated equally. It was Mormon doctrine that blacks could not be Mormon priests.
This gets into the dicey area of freedom of religion and the world of the Flying Spaghetti Monster revelations of the Book of Mormon. And it’s not like the denomination of Judaism that I am affiliated with (Conservative) doesn’t have its own issues — with women only being ordained within the last 20 years, and queer folk only being accepted in the last year. But those are fights within these religious organizations. It is when a religious organization takes those beliefs and brings them into the public political process that I take issue.
Want to start a religion where women can’t officiate? Sure, go ahead and good luck to you. Just don’t try to then pass laws that women can’t vote, hold executive jobs, or don’t have control of their own bodies. Want to invite blacks to tithe but not accept them in leadership positions? Go ahead, see where that gets you. It’s your religion and we don’t regulate it. But step into the public square with your organized bigotry and I promise I will do everything in my power to fight you.
And step into the public square and you expose yourself to public scrutiny. The LDS is crying unfair that lgbt groups are targeting their business. Boo hoo.
Writers Alison Stateman see cases like Scott Eckern, who resigned from his position as the artistic director of the California Musical Theatre in Sacramento when his contribution to Yes on 8 was revealed as evidence of a gay mafia that controls who works where.
No Alison. We’re not in charge. We just choose who we want to do business with. And that may have consequences. Don’t like it? Well, pardon me, ENDA, the Employment Non Discrimination Act, which protects lgbt people on the job, is not law. That doesn’t look like power to me. Scott Eckern chose to resign in the face of protest. I could be fired tomorrow and have no recourse.
And so, to my brothers and sisters in this chaotic movement in response to 8, don’t forget that there are also other important battles we have to win. There are gay throwaway kids living on the streets who need our support. There is homophobia in minority communities that needs to be addressed. And coming out for a demo on a nice autumn day isn’t enough.
The Mormons may have made us angry. So did orange juice queen Anita, and that made us, uh, concentrate. Now, as we fight for marriage, we need to look at really building relationship — with others in faith communities who are our allies.
Tonight the NYC queer community expressed its anger at the passage of Prop 8 in California with an old-fashioned street demonstration outside of the LDS church on Broadway and 65th Street. It was encouraging to see thousands of us to fight for marriage equality, even though it was for another state. How many of those that were out tonight have been part of the marriage equality fight in New York state? Certainly quite a few, since I recognized quite a number from the annual lobbying day in Albany. But many are not connected to any organized efforts. And there were some who chanted slogans that were anti-church.
Now, I am not exactly pro-church. I continue to be amazed that the one thing that brought together all the feuding religions to sit down in Jerusalem was their desire to issue a statement condeming queer people. It's enough to make a queer Jewish Buddhist into a militant atheist. Except that's actualy accepting their definition of queer folk — outside the spiritual. And quite frankly, I refuse to deny my connection to the Divine.
Ours is a community that has been spiritually wounded by the religious establishment. And often, at demonstrations like these, where the religious establishment has truly done something heinous, the pain of this wounding comes out in expressions of hatred for religion and denial of our deepest longings for experiencing the Divine. The reason I seek loving relationships with men is that is where I experience the Divine Presence. I experience divinity and mystery in all my relations (to steal a phrase from Body Electric) whether they are physical or not, with men and women. But that highest connection has been in loving relationship with another man.
This evening I heard a lot of anger. And anger is appropriate. But I don't want my queer community to throw out the baby with the bath water by jettisoning spiritual connection while fighting organized bigotry and ignorance masquerading as religion.
Over at fivethirtyeight.com, Nate Silver has been debunking the analysis that it was the black
community that was responsible for the Prop 8 loss. His analysis of the voting patterns showed that it was a demographic I fall in, that is voters over 45, that made the difference.
But the point i really want to make here is the lesson that needs to be learned from the Obama campaign. The queer community in California created advertising that talked to people who were already on their side. Or just to themselves. They did not get shoe leather on the ground organizing in communities around the state. They did not work hard to engage people in the middle who could be swayed one way or the other. Sure, the LDS poured lots of money into the state. But churches are also communities that are highly organized. Where is our community organization? Our leaders are not deep in the community — and they sure dont' do much cross community organizing.
The very fact that we are even having this issue be fought so closely is something I never expected to see in my lifetime. I expected when I came out and joined the gay movement in 1970 that I would see a world where we felt safe, and were not objects of ridicule, disrespect or violence. That how we expressed our love would not be a violation of the law. I wasn't expecting to see legal recognition on the order of marriage. In fact, in 1970 there were many in the movement who wanted nothing to do with the institution they saw as obsolete.
I deeply believe marriage is important and makes communities stronger. And so I want it for my queer community. I believe deeply in the American value of freedom of religion. That means there will be religions out there that will never recognize my relationships as either valid or expressions of Divine love through human action. That's okay with me. I don't have to join that religion. And they don't have to marry me to anyone.
The mixture of marriage rites and marriage rights are some of the confusion that makes this a problem in the pubiic arena. But we are not engaging the people of faith who would be on our side. I am thrilled that the Empire State Pride Agenda has a program called Pride in the Pulpit, which engages communities of faith and leaders of those communities so that they actually are a large part of the efforts in Albany to extend marriage rights. I would have liked to have seen those people at the demonstration tonight. I chose to wear a star of David and a kippah at the demonstration be be out as a person of faith, because I felt it was important not only to be queer identified, but identified with Divine love. Which transcends religion.
May we open up to the pain of our spiritual wounding and use it to reconnect. May we use this reconnection to reach out to those who would hear us and support us if we learned to listen to them and truly hear their concerns. And I know we will prevail in our cause, because ultimately, nothing can withstand the power of love.
And as I left I saw the line of police cars that we so often see even when there are no demonstrations. As though they were there to intimidate the population. When Ann Northrup was instructing the marshalls on how to make sure there was no violence at the march, all I could think was, there are provocateurs in this crowd. There are secret police taking photos. And the line of police cars did not make me feel safer, they reminded me that the Bush years have been a growing police state, that used the terrorist attack of 2001 as an excuse to further strip us of our freedoms. I can only pray that the new president can reverse this trend, even though so much of this erosion is local.
Well, other bloggers have picked on the S.J.Parker story — the story appears in a thread on Jubus in a Thai website that also notes the posting by Shravasti Dhammika that I responded to last week. The blog Going For Refuge also picks up the Parker story, and comments on it from a more personal POV. The Precious Metal blog, that covers stories of interest to Buddhists, including good coverage of Burma and Tibet, re-publishes the story whole, without comment, though its readers have a lot to say on the subject that's amusing. Tibetblogs.com picks up the Precous Metal posting whole, with the comments from the blog. Whereas over at Heck of A Guy, the focus on the Parker story shifts to Leonard Cohen, who the author is a real fan of.
In queer jubu news, a lesbian couple in Michigan was searching for a rabbi to marry them (sounds like the opening of a joke, I know). And because one of the partners came from a mixed marriage (not meaning a man and a woman but a Jew and a Gentile) the rabbi wouldn't perform the ceremony. This is actually the case at my synagogue, where there have been queer commitment ceremonies for years, but only for couples where both partners were Jewish. The reason? You are making an agreement, a covenant or b'rit, and this kind of sacred covenant requires that you be Jewish. Anything else is simply a contract. Secular.
As it turns out, they found a Jubu cantor (who is also an acupunturist) to do the ceremony. Mazel Tov! If only the Jubu cantor was a gay guy! I'd be on my way to Michigan to ask for a date.
The Joy of Yiddish defines "bissel" as meaning a little. So pardon my play on the title of the Sondheim song for this post, but the subject is apt since I wanted to let y'all know that next Tuesday, October 9th, Congregation B'nai Jeshurun's Marriage Equality Hevra is sponsoring an evening of study and conversation on the topic:"What Is The Purpose of Marrage? Marriage Equality Through a Jewish Lens."
The lead speakers will be Rabbi Steve Greenberg, author of Wrestling with God and Men: Homosexuality in the Jewish Tradition, as well as the director of the CLAL Diversity Project. Joining him will be Rabbi Brent Spodek, one of this year's Marshall T. Meyer Rabbinic Fellows at B'nai Jeshurun.
Admission is free, and it takes place at the synagogue at 257 West 88th Street in Manhattan from 7pm to 9pm.
I was in Barcelona on July 1st, 2005, the day the Spanish Parliament passed a bill legalizing same sex marriage. There was dancing in the streets that night surrounding the gay bars located in the Eixample. I was amazed that such a Catholic country, a country that had so recently come out of the ravages of Fascism, could pass such a law with such a majority. Then I realized that for years the Catholic Church had allied itself with the Fascists, and the Spanish had no love for Church involvement in the state, regardless of how religious they might or might not be. I was happy to dance in the streets that night myself, and I look forward to the opportunity to do so here in New York City sometime in the next year.
Yesterday, after the NY State Assembly passed the Marriage Equality Bill, State Senator and Majority Leader Joseph Bruno was reported to have said "We're not going to take a vote...we're not going to debate an issue that, you know, is not going to be of consequence."
Yes, you read that correctly. Our relationships are of no consequence. It's one thing to disagree about an issue, it is another thing entirely to speak of people as though they meant nothing. Contrast this with the words of the Spanish Prime Minister Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero when Spain legalized same sex marriage. He said that the dry language of the new law masks "an immense change in the lives of thousands of citizens. We are not legislating for remote, unknown people. We are expanding opportunities for the happiness of our neighbors, our work colleagues, our friends, our relatives."
Let Sen. Bruno know what you think about his position. You can email him at bruno@senate.state.ny.us
Yes, it's true it will die in the Senate. But stop and taste the sweetness of this moment — the first time such a bill was introduced without a court order mandating it, and then passing through one house in a state legislature. The lobbying efforts and hard work by Empire State Pride Agenda across the state was terrific. It was an education going up to Albany in May. And now, the action will center not only on lobbying senators for next year, but also paying attention to races where we can affect the results in our favor. This is big news. The margin of victory 85-61, was substantial. Shehechiyanu. I have lived to see this moment and its blessings.
It was just last summer when the NY Supreme Court said there was no right to same sex marriage and threw the ball back to the legislature. I am proud to be a member of a faith community that lobbied hard and made this a central initiative for the congregation this year. It is important to have voices from faith communities to counter the relentless drum beat of intolerance on the religious right.
Speaking of which, I still haven't finished writing up all the NewFest films I've seen, and one in particular
was about just this issue. In the documentary God Only Knows, a gay minister and a right wing talk radio host spend time as guests in each other's homes and church communities. It was an amazing film in that the wife of the talk show host did a 180 and supported gay marriage at one point, only to end up in a huge fight with her husband that was not pleasant to see. The radio host and the minister eventually came to an understanding, so it seemed. They agreed for a while that the government should get out of marriage, and leave it to any church to marry anyone they saw fit, or not. At least until the right wing talk show guy met with an ex-gay movement type. Then he reverted to his original position, but it felt like he was doing it cause he had to, because he would have lost his audience otherwise. It was an interesting film. And of course, the reason that these people could agree to even sit down and talk together and stay at each other's homes was because this wasn't the US. It was Canada, where everyone is so much more civilized. Well.
I'm several days behind writing about the films — the festival closed last night with a great film, with the last few days filled with great films, which I will write about in the next few days. Tonight I'll mention three, along with some questions about attendance at the festival.
One of the issues this year at the New Festival has been attendance. It was rather shocking to be at the Opening Night and see empty seats. I can’t recall a first night that wasn’t jam packed. I don’t know what the PR for the festival has been, but given the LGBT population of this city, and how starved many of us are for interesting and uncensored queer representation, something about the numbers just doesn’t seem right. As an example, consider the film Emile Norman: By His Own Design (on a smartly designed program with the excellent Bob and Jack’s 52 year Adventure, of which more later).
The Norman documentary captured the life of an American Picasso. “What?” you say. You’ve never heard of Emile Norman, and I’m calling him an American Picasso? One of the things that determines the greatness of artwork is how it shows us our lives, nature and reality in fresh and surprising ways that wake us up and make us more alive to the moment, to every detail of life. Norman’s work does just that in breathtaking sensuousness. And this documentary captures all of it.
Like Picasso, Norman has an unwavering dedication to his own artistic vision, a vision that was at variance with the times. In spite of that he made his own way, creating art that has stood the test of time. And like Picasso, he never stops working. I had never heard of Norman before this film. After seeing it, I will never forget him. His art, the story of his relationship with Brooks Clement, the great love if his life with whom he created a home that is also a work of art at a time when openly creating a life with another man was anything but easy — this is part of our hidden history at queer people. We can only be grateful to the producers for making this film.
In a moment of programming genius, the Norman film was paired with Bob and Jack’s 52 Year Adventure. The story of an army sergeant enters into an affair with his commanding officer that develops into a lifelong relationship, this documentary was a beautiful portrait of love between two men that has endured in spite of all the obstacles they had to face. [bobandjack.org] With simple interviews of the two men, together and alone, along with period photographs and archival material to round out the history, the film didn’t need great drama to leave the audience deeply moved. The warmth and love that was on display between these two men was heart opening. And it isn’t only for the gay community. I can think of few films that address two of the main issues facing our community today so sweetly and completely. By that I mean the question of queer folk in the military and same-sex marriage.
Because these men met in the military and started their relationship there we see how it affected the soldiers around them — and how the couple confronted their unit when someone wanted to turn them in. Because they’ve been together for 52 years, without slavishly following a heterosexual model, we are given a new model for marriage, one that is filled with compassion for imperfection and commitment to each other without an insistence on monogamy. More importantly, it shows why it is so important that same-sex couples have the same rights as other married couples, since we see an elderly couple deal with questions of Social Security, Medicare and the safety net of community that all older people need. On so many levels, this deceptively simple documentary is a very important film.
These two films together give gay men a model of long term relationship to counter the lies we are fed by those who created the closet, a closet that makes such relationships that survive all the stronger for the obstacles they must overcome.
But to come back to the question I asked at the start: why wasn’t this program well attended? There were only about 60 people in the theater. The people in the audience wanted to keep the producers and director of both films a long time after at the Q&A, there was so much to ask and talk about and the films engendered a passionate response. This was a program that demanded a larger audience, and if the community really understood what it was about, perhaps there would have been more people. This was also the case with a program on closing day, Tied Hands, an Israeli narrative film.
This movie starred Gila Almagor, the first lady of Israeli stage and screen. It’s as though there were a film at NewFest that starred Judi Dench, and only a few people came. What’s more, Almagor was there at the screening to answer questions, along with the Consul General from Israel. This was a big deal. And yet the screening was not well publicized or attended. How could such a thing happen? Clearly the word about the quality and importance of these movies hasn’t gotten out in a way it should. This is just about the only issue I have with NewFest — they aren’t doing a good job of promoting themselves or their film programs. As an ad guy, I know that this isn’t an easy job, but there is a built in community for these films.
The question of attendance was something that buzzed around the group of folks I sit with every year. We come every year and see upwards of 25 programs each — we’re a dedicated crew. And a rather, uh, fussy group. So this group of kibbitzers talked about why it seemed to us the numbers were down (despite Basil telling us it just isn’t so). Some suggested it’s that people stay home and watch video. Some suggested that with more mainstream images available, people don’t feel quite the need for the festival. Some wondered about the advertising and pr. I don’t know. What I do know is that I am rather passionate about this annual event, and want it to grow, nurture talent, and build an audience that is also a community. And I hate seeing empty theaters for events like the Emile Norman program, and Tied Hands. So if you're reading this and didn't go to the festival this year, you missed some great films.
On June 12, 2007 it will be the 40th anniversary of the U.S. Supreme Court decision in Loving v. VirginiaFreedom to Marry, the national organization fighting for marriage equality, is running some advertising and holding an event in DC at the Capitol to observe this event — and pointing out some of the couples who have benefited from this enlightened change in the law, including Jeb Bush for example.
It is amazing to think that this decision was handed down only 40 years ago — 1967. Two years before Stonewall. It's amazing to think gay marriage has come so far — and has engendered so much hatred that it has led to laws like the ones struck down by the Loving decision. May this country reach enlightenment on this issue soon.
