Another Queer Jewish Buddhist

He's just my type

Okay, bad pun. Sue me.

This ad appeared in adsoftheworld.com for oxydo, an Italian eyewear manufacturer. I don't like the ad. I don't like the series of ads. They don't mean anything to me. But it's fashion, so what the hell - it's supposed to make you look at it, and make the product look good. So here are a couple of pretty boys wearing nice frames. And one has a typewriter theme, which always attracts me as a typewriter enthusiast. Okay BBDO Italy got me to pay attention. I even went and looked at framesdirect.com to see what kind of frames they had here. So I guess the damn ads worked.

Still, I ain't gonna look like either of theses models. Now if these models came with the frames.... Of course, in the ad below, while the guy is pretty, the ad suggests he's not real on any number of levels. And playing with him would be rather mechanical. Okay, enough.

"We are open to all families" IKEA ad stirs controversy in Italy

Britain's Daily Mail reports that:

"Il Giornale, the newspaper owned by ruling prime minister Silvio Berlusconi, who has promoted himself as a defender of family values despite his involvement in a series of sex scandals has condemned the advert.

It labelled it as ''provocative'' and added:'’What's behind all this? It's not awareness of gay rights for gay couples. It's just a brazen marketing strategy.’

The paper went on to say that it was ''not an isolated incident'' but a clear attempt at ''Swedish Imperialism'' that tried

The paper went on to say that it was ''not an isolated incident'' but a clear attempt at ''Swedish Imperialism'' that tried to make everyone equal by having the same ''cheap furniture.''

Il Giornale, the newspaper owned by PM Silvio Berlusconi, has condemned the advert

The paper went on to say that it was ''not an isolated incident'' but a clear attempt at ''Swedish Imperialism'' that tried to make everyone equal by having the same ''cheap furniture.'' 

I am not sure what Swedish Imperialism is, though perhaps it's similar what used to be called Coca Colinization, the way American products washed over the cultures of nations after WWII.

However, what if this ad isn't trying "to make everyone equal by having the same ''cheap furniture.'' What if it is trying to convince heterosexual Italians that IKEA furniture is fashionable enough for gay couples to want to shop there, under the guise of saying they believe in equality?

Is this overthinking it? I don't know. But what I do know is that as a gay man, I sure don't want to have IKEA furniture in my home. I do I'm sorry to say, but it's for functional pieces only like book cases. Their chairs and couches are uniformly uncomfortable. In my opinion at least.

But 3 cheers to them anyway for the ad — not the first time IKEA has used gay (male) couples. Now if they could only do something about the garish logo.

Choc Tease: Women with (malt) balls make this TV commercial one of the U.K.'s faves and a queer hit.

<p>It's always nice to see two men cuddling together on the couch with a gay kiss (even if it is unconscious smooching). Even if, from my point of view it's not naughty or new. But as a TV spot for candy? Sweet. My thank yous to Johnny in Rhode Island for catching this on the list of top 10 best-liked TV ads in Britain:

The Best, Most Strategic Viral Web Copywriting You'll Ever Read...Today

Brian Barrett over at Gizmodo waxed rhapsodic over the "rant" in this online ad for an inkjet cartrtidge. And he wasn't the only one. As if it really were a Howard Beale moment in the world of copywriting. Really?

There's a process that we copywriters go through. Nothing is unmediated. Forget that things go past supervisors, account people. Let's just stop and notice all the spelling errors in this piece. It wouldn't get through proofreading.

I suspect this was an extremely clever viral strategy that everyone fell for. Because this has turned up all over the web today.

I can be certain this was a plant because way before the Internet became a public wall instead of a Defense Department tool I was living in Tokyo, where I worked as an English language copywriter at Japan's largest ad agency, Dentsu. And I created an ad for a very rare daring Japanese client who ran it knowing it would become a subject written about with humorous condescension in Tokyo's many English language newspapers.

If you follow sites like BoingBoing and Gizmodo, you will on occasion find hilarious examples of Janglish — that weird combination of Japanese and English that comes from either a misunderstanding or spelling errors. My client, the New Otani Hotel, had a steak restaurant on the premises called The Rib Room. In Japanese, the R and L sounds are very close, and the B and V sounds are very close. So a Japanese person, in trying to pronounce the English work Live might say, and for that matter, spell this word, in a way that a native English speaker might hear as Rib.

Taking out the copywriter tool box, which includes using familiar phrases and playing with them to make a headline more memorable, I wrote the ad you see below for the restaurant. I told the client that some in the local press and letter writers would make merciless fun of them for running the ad. And that others would recognize that the restaurant was in on the joke. But that it would be reprinted and talked about. It was.

I make no claims to this being award winning or wildly creative. When I was a 30 year old writer in Tokyo, I was proud to have found an opportunity to do something fun, and happy to find a client brave enough to play.

Today, the internet makes such opportunities both harder and easier to recognize. But when done well, and when picked up, the rewards can be a worldwide business bump, instead of simply a few more seats filled at The New Otani.

Mind you, the only reason there was an open position in Tokyo so that I got the job was that a writer before me had mischeviously written a headline for a now defunct Japanese bank that took advantage of the fact that the Japanese client didn't recognize the semi-salacious word-play.

The logo of the Dai-Ichi Kangyo Bank was a heart. So this writer's headline, which ran in the Japan Times and the other local English language papers was: Dai Ichi Kangyo Has A Heart On For You.

I don't get opportunities like this much anymore. My work does in fact go through account people, proofreaders, lawyers lawyers and more lawyers. So you might understand why I don't believe the ink cartridge ad was a real "rant." A great copywriter sees opportunities on match book covers if that's the media to work in (and that tells you how old I am!). 

Never juxtapose the word "scream" with "German engineering"...

Is it just me? I mean, I realize it's been 65 years since the end of WWII, but the headline for this ad for Bosch in today's New York Times made me recall the photographs of bodies stacked outside the crematoria. It just creeped me out.

Now I realize that the copywriter who wrote this, and all the executives involved are probably under the age of 35. And I know I work in an industry with people like Jerry Della Femina, whose book "From Those Wonderful Folks Who Gave You Pearl Harbor" I devoured in the 70s when I was working at Ted Bates. When I watched the episode on Mad Men this last season where Roger Sterling was enraged by the agency pitching a Japanese car company I recalled my next door neighbor when I was a child in the early 60s who went batshit crazy angry when an Asian family moved in down the street because his son died in the Pacific (no matter that the new neighbors weren't Japanese, all Asians were suspect to him). I don't want to think of myself in any way like these guys.

But this headline just stopped me. And not in a good way.

But to critique it from another POV for a moment: if the agency thinks that the people who drive a Mercedes is the target for this ad, it works, since a Mercedes is quiet. But I would imagine that there are just as many BMW owners who read the Times. And a BMW is not a quiet machine — part of the satisfaction of a BMW to its owner is the sound of the engine.

Sorry, this ad just doesn't rise to the level of David Ogilvy's famous line: "At 60 miles an hour the loudest noise in this new Rolls-Royce comes from the electric clock." And personally, it leaves me with a sinking feeling.

 

Men who know how to play with it.

The men behind Butch Bakery have a post-gay sense of humor. With products described as" Masculine styled cupcakes for the guys (and the guys/girls who love em!)" and a website that makes fun of frilly pink frosted cupcakes in a way that doesn't feel like coded queer bashing but in fact is laughing at homophobia and misogyny while at the same time introducing a whole new kind of cupcake experience that clearly can be said to have a masculine aesthetic. Kudos to founder David Arrick and to ad agency readybreak in New York for creating a print campaign that truly made me laugh out loud. 

School bullying / Anti gay bullying and advertising:

I've been watching this Chrysler Town and Country commercial for months and every time I see it I am disturbed. It's clear the spot was directed so that the boy who jumps in his mother's van is running from a gang of boys who want to beat him up.

The voiceover suggests it's just a race home, though even in this challenge there is a note of menace.

You can see from the face of "Parker," the boy they are chasing, that he is running in fear.

What was the agency that made this thinking? It's bad enough that school teachers across the country turn a blind eye (or even participate) to bullying behavior. But for an ad agency, in this case, I believe it's Fallon since they're the agency of record for Chrysler, to run an ad which uses the situation to get attention (and entertain and sell) in the today's climate is irresponsible. Because while it's true this behavior is widespread, showing it in a commercial in this way normatizes it. Condones it, even as Parker manages to get away because of the hero product, and his clueless mom driving the Town and Country.

Chrysler should stop running this ad immediately. And both Chrysler and Fallon should be contributing serious money to organizations that combat the scourge of bullying and organizations that protect lgbt youth and youth at risk of bullying.

There has been enough written about this online for me to know now that I'm not the only person who sees this storyline. And some say that the voiceover track was changed from a more overt bullying situation. I wouldn't be surprised given the way the spot is directed. I would guess that the agency presented this to the client as an inexpensive fix to a bad mistake. Sorry guys, doesn't work. You ought to eat the cost, and reshoot a new spot. And pay for your mistake with support for bullied youth.

Take a look at the spot: do you see this the way I see it? And where the hell is GLAAD? After last week's awards to agencies for the good they do, why haven't they raised this as an issue?

 

Substituting Homoeroticism For Health Claims: The New POM Wonderful Advertising

Actor Erik Fellows wanders through the desert without a care how the sun will damage his skin. Why? Because he has the anti oxidant power of POM Wonderful. Ahem.

Okay, let me say I have been a customer. I actually seed pomegranates every week and put them on my cereal (along with blueberries). I drink pomegranate juice. I do this because there is anecdotal evidence for prostate health. However, last week the FTC finally woke up to its responsibilities and came down on POM for what they said were unsubstantiated claims. And heaven knows, POM does do its best to have people believe that their product will help protect men from prostate cancer. That it's 40% as effective as Viagra. Well, I think Erik Fellows on my TV screen (or anywhere in my home) would obviate the need for Viagra.

Now that POM is having trouble with their health claims, they've created some videos that get to the sexual potency claims without saying anything directly. Though in one ad they allude to the fruit's mythical status as an aphrodisiac. They also allude to the claims they can't make by saying "backed by modern science," but they don't say what claim is being backed up. This is classic weasel wording.

When I first started as a copywriter, I remember working on Cascade dish detergent. You know, it gets dishes VIRTUALLY spotless. Not spotless, virtually spotless. Almost. Because they can't make the full claim legally. UNSURPASSED is another weasel work: it means that the product being sold is equal to the competition — it's a parity product. The POM videos are beautiful examples of weasel wording.

These videos are beautifully shot. They use mythic imagery and eroticism to make the emotional association to the claims they can no longer say legally. And I suspect if POM had introduced their product with these video spots they would have become award winners, and given POM a classy image. They may yet do so. The spots certainly have what it takes to win some awards. 

But nowadays, I get Marco Polo brand pomegranate juice. It costs a lot less, and isn't as sweet. And I know that unlike Persephone, even though I consume hundreds of pomegranate seeds in a week, I'm no prisoner of Hades.

You can see the full POM ad below, and you can read about the FTC complaint against POM here.

Facebook, Gay Rights, Advertising, Political Organizing and Free Speech.

There are hundreds of Facebook groups organized around political principles and action. I belong to some of them. A couple of weeks ago there was another Facebook firestorm when the Boycott BP page lost admin privileges. Facebook said it was a glitch and the page privileges were restored. Not so for the Target boycott page — and the paper with the business scoop behind it is Washington D.C.’s MetroWeekly: Facebook will be selling gift cards in Target stores this fall holiday season, so enabling a boycott through their platform directly goes against their business interests. And lets not forget that Facebook is a business.

 The details were reported in USA Today:

 The social-network giant is getting into the gift card business, starting Sunday, with Facebook Credits cards. The new Facebook gift cards will be available in values of $15, $25 and $50 at all of Target's 1,750 retail stores and at Target.com. Two or three more national retailers will start selling the cards in coming months. This will be the first time Facebook has had any presence in a retail store. Facebook already has an arrangement with online-payment services PayPal and MOL to purchase Facebook Credits.

How big a business is this? In today's New York Times,  it is estimated that this year alone the  market in Facebook credits will reach $835 million.  

So it’s no surprise Facebook has disabled the administrative functions of groups that are organizing a boycott of Target in response to Target’s contributions to anti-gay politicians.

 The Internet is a friend of the corporate oligarchy.

 Facebook isn’t some non-profit service to the world community. Like Google, it is an advertising platform. Their value is in the private information they collect and use to help advertisers target prospects and customers.

 In the world of advertising, when an advertiser asks for personal information from a prospect or customer there is always something called a value exchange. The customer gives up some personal information in return for an offer, a discount, something useful. Think of it as a trade.

 Facebook is just such a trade — it has enabled half a billion people around the world to communicate in groups in ways that have never been possible. Of course, along the way, Facebook has collected enough personal information on all these people to make the secret police in any state quiver with desire. The Stasi would be envious of their info gathering ability.

Even without giving up specific information an MIT study last year demonstrated that Facebook friend connections could be used to determine with a strong degree of accuracy whether a man is gay even if he is in the closet.

An Unprecedented Level of Personal Information Given Freely Can Lead To Less Freedom

I am under no illusions when I use Facebook. Or Google for that matter. Just as I have given out information on this blog that could be used by a totalitarian government as evidence to imprison me for thought crimes and/or political beliefs, sexual practices, etc., my actions on Facebook and Google give corporations the information they need to imprison me in the net of the corporate oligarchy.

Remember, I’m an advertising executive. I like advertising. I believe it has a positive social role. I think the internet makes finding stuff I want amazingly easy — just last week I bought a book of Nepalese folktales from a publisher half a world away from their site. But search engines, or Facebook for that matter, like any tool, it can be used for ill. A hammer can be used to build a house or bash a head. And when you hold a hammer, you understand it’s possibility to do both those things.

 When you use Facebook, you may not think about how it can be used against you. Many young people have learned already that posting photos of drunken student antics have ruined employment possibilities. That’s because today, human resources departments don’t need to seek references — they can simply Google your name and see whatever might be online. This is not news. What was news the other weeks was when Google head Eric Schmidt joked about it suggesting people change their names legally if they wanted to hide their past internet indiscretions.

Facebook as a public utility rather than a business —  First Amendment rights should apply.

So Facebook has an economic interest in making sure Facebook users shop at Target. And they have an interest in making sure no one can use their service to spread information about a Target boycott.

However, when a service like Facebook becomes so ubiquitous as to have taken on the role as public square, we have to claim our role as citizens — not consumers. Facebook in fact is denying the right of free speech. Not unlike a shopping mall tries to deny political speech in mall common areas.

The public square, and the streets, as public property are protected by the First Amendment. Facebook however, is a corporation, and users give up their rights to use the service. This is the creeping danger of corporate media and the web.

Broadcasters, because they are licensed by the state to use the airwaves (how quaint a thought, airwaves) which belong to the public, must abide by certain rules — from providing community and educational programming as well as free advertising time for public service messages.

Webcasters like Facebook do not seem to have these restrictions — even though the infrastructure for the Internet was developed by the federal government. And while it has evolved far beyond that original infrastructure, the internet, like the airwaves, are a public trust. And corporate webcasters like Facebook should be subject to fairness doctrines just as broadcasters were — I saw were because if there were still a fairness doctrine Fox news would not exist. And while I don’t believe in censorship, I do believe that since Fox news is really propaganda and nothing else their license to broadcast should be revoked.  The fairness doctrine must be restored to broadcasting.

The internet, since it was developed by the government, is a public trust, and net neutrality must be maintained.

The internet, as a public trust, is also a place where the rights around public speech must hold.

These are bedrock principles we as citizens (and lets remember our role and responsibility as citizens instead of the role we have been assigned by the corporate oligarchy as mere consumers) must demand are enforced by our elected officials before they are completely bought out.

Is this all it takes to get a cute guy?

Sign me up for fishnet now: